Eternity in Her Heart

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find 

out the work that God does from beginning to end…I know that whatever God does, It shall be forever. Nothing can be added to it, And nothing taken from it.
God does it, that men should fear before Him.

Eccl 3:11-14

This past Thanksgiving was very special and I will never forget it…it was at my house; dinner tasted great (thanks to my mom and Tiff); Joel, Tiff, and the girls were able to be with us this year; it was my first Thanksgiving having a boyfriend joining in; Dad, mom, and Nate were there; and the most special and memorable to me will be having my grandma with us one last time at the dinner table.  I tear up as I write this because it hurts so much but I want to take this opportunity to boast about my grandma before you all.  As a special touch to the Thanksgiving dinner table this year it was on my heart to have name cards at each plate setting at the table with scriptures on the inside.  So I picked out some scriptures, printed them out on the cards, folded them, mixed them up, picked up each one without looking at it and wrote a name on it.  I had prayed that the Lord would choose which scripture He would want for each person.  The above scripture is what my grandma’s name was placed on.   “He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts…” My grandma passed away three days later with eternity with Jesus on her heart…she was one of His and He made everything beautiful to her when He called her home Sunday morning at 3:34 a.m.  Just in the past couple of weeks, before she passed, on a couple of different times I heard her going around the house opening doors saying "I'm here! I'm here!" and then she would find me and ask if I was calling her and each time I told her that I didn't call her - she told me that clearly she heard someone calling for her - I believe it was the Lord calling her. It’s a mystery to me as death boggles my mind how at one moment a body can be moving and functioning, full of life, and within a split second the heart stops beating and life departs – it’s a mystery.  The day before she passed she said she wished the Lord would take her and then that evening before bed – the last time I talked to her -  she reminded me how the Lord took my grandpa just like that (while snapping her fingers) and she was telling me that’s how she wanted to go.  She had eternity in her heart…she groaned to be with Jesus and to be reunited with my grandpa again.

My grandma was a prayer warrior.  When she had a story to tell it would always be about when she was a part of an intercessory prayer group at her church years back.  She would tell about how she and the other women would get together and pray and how she would see God move and work through their prayers.  My grandma would always tell me she was praying for me and I would always know to go to her and tell her what I needed her to pray for me on – I could count on her for that. 

My grandma loved to sing.  In the middle of the night I would wake up to her singing an old hymn – never figured out which one it was – but it was a climbing the scale hymn where it would start low and then she would climb very high on the scale – it would always wake me up.  I thought it was sweet at first but when I started losing sleep I started throwing the pillows over my head. One morning I heard my grandpa talking to her asking her if she heard some moaning noise in the middle of the night – she responded with “I didn’t hear anything”.  I laughed to myself because I knew he was talking about her singing.

My grandma loved reading God’s Word.  She frequently would stop me to show me scriptures or ask questions about the Bible.  She would spend hours on end reading on the porch swing or on the couch.

My grandma was a giver.  She always put others before herself.  We would have to always force her to sit on the couch because she would always take the hard, uncomfortable chair first.  It would always turn into an argument - some of the times we would win and other times she would be stubborn and win.  She also loved blessing others with money…countless times it was to her joy to buy us dinner and on many occasions I would come into my room with money left on my dresser.  She didn’t know it but she always left it when I needed it the most…the Lord knew and she was just letting Him use her.  She knew the joy of the use of money – which was to give it away.

I loved my grandma very much and I would give anything just to have a little more time with her.  I miss her presence.  I miss coming home and seeing her sitting on the recliner.  I’m gonna miss walking into the family room after getting dressed up and having her tell me how beautiful I look before leaving the house.  I’m gonna miss how I would tell her something and she would reply with an answer that had nothing to do with what I said.  I’m gonna miss her smile.  I’m gonna miss watching Wheel of Fortune with her.  I’m gonna miss waking up to the theme song of “Walker, Texas Ranger” (Chuck Norris was her other man).  I’m gonna miss her hug and kiss goodnight.  I’m gonna miss the “I love you’s”.  I’m gonna miss going to her closet and laughing as I find my pink shirt hanging up in there. I’m gonna miss decorating our Christmas tree with her.  I’m gonna miss going to Lowes and picking out garden flowers with her in the spring.  I miss her, the house is cold and empty, and I am so lonely without her.

A few verses up from the scripture I quoted it says “To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven: A time to be born, And a time to die; …A time to weep, And a time to laugh; A time to mourn, And a time to dance;”  In this time of the physical death of my grandma, my family and I are in a time of weeping and mourning.  We lost a huge piece of our lives. While we do have the wonderful hope of seeing her again there’s still this time of weeping and mourning to take place.  We covet your continued prayers through this difficult time. I also want to take this time to encourage you who read this to slow down…take more time to connect with your loved ones and treasure the times you have with them – the good times and the irritating times.
 

Remember Me!

“Then God remembered Noah…”
Genesis 8:1

I read the above passage this morning and I so needed this reminder for today. For Noah and his family there was a storm raging all around them – literally the flood gates of heaven were opened, pouring water all over the earth and drowning everything they once knew, but God’s hand of protection was upon them the whole time.  In Genesis 7:1, we see that God invited Noah to come into the ark.  He was saying “Noah, I’m here in the ark, come in, I will be riding through this storm with you.  Here is where there’s shelter from the storm, a place of refuge, come in.”  Notice after God had told Noah to come in that there is nothing recorded that God spoke to him at all during those 40 days and 40 nights of the storm.  No doubt God had the ark in full control as it raged through the currents and got tossed to and fro by the waves.  No doubt they could sense His presence was with them, but do you ever wonder what was going on in their minds during those 40 days and 40 nights of silence from God?  No doubt that Noah and his family felt the bumping and rocking of the ark along the way.  No doubt they were wondering how long they would be in the ark.  

Have you ever been in the middle of a storm that has been raging for a very long time and been waiting and pleading with the Lord for a break in the clouds but there was nothing, just silence from Him?   And just when you see a crack of light peaking through the clouds, the clouds seem to cover it up again?  In these moments do you feel like God has forgotten about you, has abandoned you?  Take courage, beloved of God – He has not forgotten you!  When we come to Genesis 8 and read “Then God remembered Noah” it doesn’t mean that He forgot about him.  Believe me, God doesn’t have blonde moments – He wasn’t like “OMGEEEEEEEZ!!! I left Noah, his family, and all the animals on the ark – I hope they made it out alive!!!”  No! God is sovereign - in complete control at ALL times!  If we could only get this through our minds every moment of every day!   When it says “Then God remembered Noah” the word remember means “to pay attention to, to fulfill a promise and act on behalf of somebody”.  God was now going to act on behalf of Noah and bring the storm to an end.  It says in Psalm 139:17 that God’s thoughts are precious toward us and more in number than the sand of the sea.  His thoughts toward us are of peace and not evil, to give us a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11).  We are constantly on His mind. The cries of His children are never ignored.  Hold on - He is faithful! Know that He has placed you in His protective ark and you are absolutely in the safest place you can be - right in the middle of His will. 

God, remember me! 

Victoriously Stinky and Fragrant All at the Same Time!

 

“And I got it, thank God! In the Messiah, in Christ, God leads us from place to place in one perpetual victory parade. Through us, he brings knowledge of Christ. Everywhere we go, people breathe in the exquisite fragrance.  Because of Christ, we give off a sweet scent rising to God, which is recognized by those on the way of salvation — an aroma redolent with life. But those on the way to destruction treat us more like the stench from a rotting corpse. This is a terrific responsibility. Is anyone competent to take it on? No — but at least we don't take God's Word, water it down, and then take it to the streets to sell it cheap. We stand in Christ's presence when we speak; God looks us in the face. We get what we say straight from God and say it as honestly as we can.” 2 Cor 2:14-17 from THE MESSAGE

The on-going saga goes like this: Squirrel out-smarted the cage, squirrel out-smarted the rat traps, but the squirrel did not escape the gopher poison!  That’s right people poison was the last line of defense and it had to be done!  So, one might ask “How do you know the squirrel is dead?”  Well, four days after the feast of peanut butter mixed with “special” gopher food was placed out in the garage, with no apparent sightings or sounds of the squirrel, this smell started creeping over my closet/bathroom area.  As day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31….and now day 67 has passed the smell came in as weak, then strong, then stronger, then strongest, and is now creeping backward.  I guess you can say over the past 9 weeks I have experienced the stench of a rotting corpse.  If you have ever been in the same room as a cadaver (i.e. for an anatomy or medical class), walked by a dead animal, or perhaps had a rotting animal in your attic you know what I’m talking about as far as the stench.  Febreeze – tried it – didn’t work.  Air purifier – tried it – didn’t work.  Deodorizer – tried it – didn’t work.  Kirklands’ fragrance oil – smells so delicious, but no, didn’t work.  This leaves me------------>  : (  Turns out Mr. Squirrel breathed his last in a location impossible to reach and remove it.  How do I know that? I sent my little brother up in the attic to find the creeper.  But all I got out of that was him crashing through the ceiling in the closet of the guest bedroom making about a 4ftx4ft hole and no apprehension of the decomposing squirrel.  This leaves me---------------> :’(.  So, the conclusion:  I must continue to wait it out. 

So, as I look back on these past 9 weeks of the most horrible stench that I must wake up to, come home to, and go to sleep to, I ask the Lord WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???!!!  And then the above scripture came to mind and I say “Gee, thanks Lord for making this passage so real and applicable to me but you really didn’t have to!”  So, here it goes…

Do circumstances around you sometimes give you the feeling of being conquered, uncomfortable, that you’re coming to an end of a battle and it will end in defeat?  In doing some research to the above passage I came to find out that before Paul wrote this second letter to the Corinthians, that he was in a place of what seemingly appeared that his plans were falling apart.  He couldn’t find Titus, his letter deliverer.  He didn’t know what was going on in Corinth and how they received his first letter to them (this letter was a confrontational letter regarding their misconduct). He had open doors of ministry in Troas but didn’t have a peace to stay because he was distracted with concern for the Corinthians.  There were a lot of unanswered questions and he was in that place of not knowing what he should do next as he was seeing his plans weren’t going according to plan.  There was that common feeling that we have sometimes when we feel like we’re in limbo.  So what do you do when you’re in this place? Like Paul, you keep walking with God, keep being faithful with what God has entrusted you with, trusting Him, and simply waiting for His plan to unfold. 

When we come to this passage in 2 Corinthians 2, the fog of unknowns and feelings of defeat cleared as Paul now sees how God wanted it all along.  Paul relates it to the picture of the “Roman Triumph” the special tribute that was given by Rome to their conquering generals.  If the commander in chief won a victory over the enemy he was given a processional which included him riding in a golden chariot surrounded by his officers.  Also involved with this processional would be all the captive enemy soldiers and the Roman priests who would carry burning incense to pay tribute to the victorious army.  The procession would end with the captives entertaining the people by fighting wild beasts (The Bible Exposition Commentary/Wiersbe).   As Paul was giving this illustration he brings up how we as believers are the fragrance of Christ that diffuses to every person we come in contact with.  But, notice with me, how he makes the point that our fragrance affects different people in different ways.  When the people of Rome could smell the fragrance of the burning incense as it filled the city streets it meant to them the smell of victory, triumph, life, and rejoicing, but to the captive enemy it meant defeat and death.  As children of God we are a part of the victory that has already been won through Jesus Christ.  “We do not fight for victory, we fight from victory” (Wiersbe).  The victory has already been won by Jesus Christ so we can walk victoriously knowing that He is in full control, sovereign, He sees our circumstances, He sees the parade from the above view - beginning to end – and calls us to trust Him and walk in triumph with Him!  Paul ends this chapter with thankfulness to God for leading him (not according to Paul’s plans but God’s plans) and the realization that even when you feel (ßbe careful feelings are very deceptive!) defeated God is still working and is still opening new doors of opportunity to diffuse the gospel through the fragrance of your life…to those who are being saved and to those who are perishing.

Between a Rock and a Hard Place

Then he said to Him,"If Your Presence does not go with us, do not bring us up from here.  For how then will it be known that Your people and I have found grace in Your sight, except You go with us? So we shall be separate, Your people and I, from all the people who are upon the face of the earth."  So the Lord said to Moses,"I will also do this thing that you have spoken; for you have found grace in My sight, and I know you by name."  And he said, "Please, show me Your glory." Then He said, "I will make all My goodness pass before you, and I will proclaim the name of the Lord before you. I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion." But He said, "You cannot see My face; for no man shall see Me, and live." And the Lord said, "Here is a place by Me, and you shall stand on the rock. So it shall be, while My glory passes by, that I will put you in the cleft of the rock, and will cover you with My hand while I pass by.  Then I will take away My hand, and you shall see My back; but My face shall not be seen."                                                              Exodus 33:15-23

Have you ever been in a place desiring to see God in all His glory in the midst of your circumstances but you were stuck in the in-between, wedged in, unable to move, just waiting to see how God was going to move next?  It’s so not a comfortable place to be.  If you’re like me the first thing you want to do is see how you can get out of it in which sometimes that involves kicking, screaming, resisting, and scrambling to make better of the situation and try to fix it yourself, but that won’t help because you will still find yourself in a holding tank.  As we read in the above verses, Moses is asking God for reassurance that His presence will go with him as he departs with the children of Israel.  We ask “Good grief…doesn’t Moses already know God is with him? Was it not God who burned with presence in the bush telling Moses that He would certainly be with him (Ex. 3:12)? Was not God’s presence there when He instructed Moses to lift his rod and stretch out his hand over the sea to divide it so that they may pass through to the other side (Exodus 14:16)?  Was not God’s presence there every morning as He provided manna for him and the children of Israel to eat (Exodus 16:21; Psalm 78:24-25)?”  But, here we see Moses (BTW, just after God promising Moses His presence would be with him) telling God “Look, God, I’m not going anywhere without You”.  Not that this is a bad statement – it’s definitely good – but it’s like gosh Moses what more do you need to make it more obvious that God’s presence is already with you.  But see how easy it is to sit here and pass judgment on him when we do the exact same thing ourselves???  How many times do we face circumstances when we’re like “Oh no God, I’m being pressured, smothered in on this one…this is too much I can feel the walls closing in. I can’t breathe.  I can’t sleep. I can’t eat.  I think I’m just going to find a corner somewhere, devour a 10 pound bag of peanut M&M’s and say over and over again to myself “Just think happy thoughts, just think happy thoughts, just think happy thoughts…”.  I can’t feel You. I can’t sense Your presence in this situation. Where is Your presence Lord?  About a month and a half ago I was driving home from work on I-395 aka “blood alley” and while I was just getting into the left turn lane on Luna Road I heard the noise of crashing metal and saw car parts flying in the air.  A lady had run the red light and T-boned a pick-up truck.  In the moment of impact both the cars spun off each other and were both coming head on in my direction.  All I could do was sit, watch, and grasp the steering wheel.  There was no reaction time to get out of the way all I could do was sit and wait…wait to see how this was going to end.  Before my very eyes, literally a few feet away from me, both cars parted and I had Red Sea experience; God showed me His presence was there with me.  The truck had completely cleared and went to my left while the car went to my right just scratching and scuffing my fender.  God’s glory was shown to me that day while being caught between a rock and a hard place.  God said to Moses “You want to feel my presence? You want to see my glory through this?  Then I’m going to place you in the cleft of the rock and cover you with My hand.”  And so He says the same to us,  “You may get dirty, you may get uncomfortable, you may feel like you can’t breathe, or even that there should be a better way, but when I pass by you, take away My hand, you will see My glory.” 

Are you stuck between a rock and a hard place?  Child of God know this:  He loves you.  And even though you’re in this tight spot, His hand is covering and shielding you as He is preparing to reveal His glory to you and even to those around you (Exodus 34:29). 

Awaiting His Glory,

Audra 

Trapped in Your Sin?

Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am tempted by God"; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone. But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, 
brings forth death.

James 1:13-15

Sooooooo…there’s this squirrel.  Recently there have been very suspicious things happening in my garage and one by one they were all pieced together.  It started with me finding Jill (my stored away holiday scarecrow) knocked down in the garage so I stopped…looked at it…and go, “Hmm, how did that fall down?” So, I pick it up and put it back in its right spot and…I carry on. Then, over the course of a week, I realize things like areas of leaf piles here and there, disarrayed bouquets of my dried out rose petals scattered on the ground, little paint bottles knocked over, and a little bitty whole in the side of the garage(which is stopped up normally) is exposed.  So, as I look around and see these things happening I go “Hmm” and I carry on. But, then….one fateful Tuesday morning as I’m making my running dash out the door to open the garage and get off to work my feet come to a screeching halt and my mouth opens with a squeal (Squeal:  a short high cry expressing pain or other strong emotion) and I’m stopped dead in my tracks.  Lo and behold I am not alone for out of the corner of my eye something darted across the garage floor!  And within a 10 second span I have this conversation in my head: 

“What was that?” 

“I have no idea!”

“Should I attempt to go 5 feet from the garage door to the car and risk being attacked?”

“Go for it - you can make a running attempt, after all you can’t be late to work!”

So I ran for the car jumped in and left in hopes that the little creature made its way out.  So over the course of the week I tried to forget about it and not seeing any new signs of messes I figured it was gone until…my mom, the key witness who identified it as being furry tailed, had a run in with it just a few days later.  As each day passed by I found some new and old things it was doing around the garage like scratching up drywall and continually exposing the whole in the wall. But wait, oh yes, wait – there’s more!  One morning my little furry tailed pest had made its way into the attic and was scratching above my closet.   This is it-it’s on now!  I shouted up to it “I’m gonna find you and when I do I’m going to kill you!” Harsh? Okay, maybe…sorry animal lovers.  No, my intent wasn’t to kill it but to trap it!  To trap a pesky squirrel one must lure it in the cage with an alluring feast - a feast consisting of peanut butter, salty potato chips, and of course peanuts ;) 

Soooooo….there’s this squirrel.  As pesky and irritating as it has been trying to trap it - it has been a visual illustration to me from the Lord.  You see, I just “so happened” to be finishing up a study that I had been doing with our high school girls in which it was talking about being trapped in your sin.  We read in James “But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed” We just like this squirrel can find ourselves in places where we don’t belong whether it be where our feet take us, what our eyes look at, what our ears listen to, or even the places we go to in our minds.  We initially enter into traps with  curiosity, stumbling into, poking around, getting into things that we shouldn’t be in, all in the meanwhile affecting others in the things we do (sin has a way of doing that – it not only affects you but also affects those around you).  We’re drawn away by our own desires.  Temptation in and of itself is not a sin; when you give into temptation then it becomes a sin.  When you continue to poke around you’ll eventually become trapped.  How? Just like the squirrel in order to trap it, it must be lured in.  I have to put something out that smells good for food and is pleasant to the eyes (Gen 3:6-7) that will do the job of drawing it in.  We work the same way.  If sin appeared ugly and nasty we probably wouldn’t go near it.  But because sin is pleasurable for a season (Hebrews 11:25) and appears great, it is very easy to get lured in and trapped in it if we don’t take the way of escape that God offers (1 Cor. 10:13).  As children of God, He gives us a way of escape when we are tempted and we must flee away from it quickly.  If we don’t and choose to be drawn away by giving into temptation, we will eventually find ourselves trapped in our sin, locked in a cage, awaiting either death (Romans 6:23 “For the wages of sin is death…”) or to be set free from it (1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” and Rom 6:22-23 “But now having been set free from sin, and having become slaves of God, you have your fruit to holiness, and the end, everlasting life.”)  You see, on one end we can see the enemy wanting to see us remaining to be trapped in our sin and left to die but on the other end we can see God desiring to set us free through the blood of Christ and giving us a new start.  God loves you.  He loves you so much that He doesn’t desire to see you caught up and trapped in your sin. Whom the Lord loves He chastens (Hebrews 12:6) and He will do whatever it takes to get your attention.  Don’t learn the hard way next time; when tempted take the way of escape.

I lift an anthem of praise to You, God, for always providing a way of escape from sin.  I know I can stand on the truth that I can do ALL things through You who strengthens me while knowing at the same time that apart from You I can do absolutely nothing.  Please help me not to drawn away by my own desires but to submit myself completely to You out of my love and devotion to You.

Don’t be a Squirrel,   

Audra