Stepping into the Unknown

“By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to the place which he would receive as an inheritance.  And he went out, not knowing where he was going.” Hebrews 11:8

On May 23^rd, 2012, the Lord completed my time at Calvary Chapel Adelanto/Victor Valley and now has a new beginning for me.  I ask that you pray for me as I begin this new journey and step out in faith not knowing where I’m going.  My faith is knowing that just as God’s presence moved in the cloud by day and the fire by night with the children of Israel following, so I realize that as God goes before me I will follow, knowing that I will never arrive at a place where God has not first preceded and prepared just for me. 

As I look back over these past 7 ½ years of serving at Calvary Chapel Adelanto/Victor Valley the best way to sum it up would be seeing it as boot camp – for this is where I got intensely trained.  In the spiritual sense I had muscles stretched, exercised, and formed that I never knew existed.  There has been blood (from several paper cuts ;) ), sweat, and tears put into this training time.  When I started there on August 12, 2004 with the expectation of full time ministry, little did I understand that as a child of God and follower of Jesus Christ that full time ministry began the moment I surrendered my life to Him.  Because, when Jesus calls someone to surrender to Him by leaving their old life, He then bids them to come and follow Him and from that point our lives are to be full time ministry.  My problem was I was given the perception that full time ministry was dedicating your life working at church – this perception was so wrong.  You see, God calls you and me no matter where we’re at or what we’re doing to be busy about in “full time ministry” of living out the gospel – the Good News – of Jesus Christ.  Are you a stay at home wife and mother?  You’re in full time ministry.  Are you on duty in the military?  You’re in full time ministry.  Are you in prison?  You’re in full time ministry.  Are you a worker at Wal-mart?  You’re in full time ministry.  Are you a police officer?  You’re in full time ministry.  Are you a student in school?  You’re in full time ministry.  Are you retired? You’re in full time ministry.  Are you confined to bed with sickness?  You’re in full time ministry.  Are you elderly?  You’re in full time ministry.  Are you single?  You’re in full time ministry.  Wherever you’re at, whatever circumstances you find yourself in DO NOT dictate who you are in Christ and the life of ministry He’s called you to live for Him.  I’m going to go one step further…your identity can’t even be found in ministry – your identity has to be found in Christ alone.  So, with that said, I’m letting everyone know that I’m not walking away from ministry but I’m continuing on with my ministry.

It says in Hebrews 11:6 “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” I’m here to testify to all of you that God is very real.  Just in the past couple of years in the midst of my grandpa drowning in my swimming pool; to my grandma passing a year and a half later; to being robbed; to going through a loss of relationship; to now losing my job - He has proven to be there with me every step of the way and has showed me that even with these people and things taken away from me that He is still everything.  I have judged Him faithful in every circumstance I’ve had to endure and I believe that He will continue to be faithful.  Everything is ordered by Him and even though I don’t understand why He allows some things to happen, I must say it is well with my soul knowing that He is full control.  I’m not going to lie - I get terrified sometimes and overwhelmed with the unknown…yes, people I’m human!  I can easily chant “I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful!  I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful!” and then moments later feel so crazy overwhelmed in my head that I want to drive myself to the hospital and get pumped up with drugs just so I can stop thinking.  In moments like this I must “run with endurance the race that is set before (me), LOOKING UNTO JESUS, the author and finisher of (my) faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:1-2).  Just the thought alone of Jesus sitting this very moment next to God interceding for me brings so much comfort!  I also have to thank all of you who have already been flooding heaven with prayers for me – I am in awe of your love and support.

To the One who alone is wise, all-knowing, and perfect in all His ways, my life is completely surrendered to His plan and I turn my eyes forward, walking hand in hand with Jesus as I step into the unknown.

What is that to You?

So Peter seeing him said to Jesus, "Lord, and what about this man?"  Jesus said to him, "If I want him to remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow Me!" 

John 21:21-23

   < -------- Hi-eeeeeeeeeeee! Yep, it’s me - all excited and ready to get a cake decorated in class!  I had been anticipating it all week long to see what kind of “awwwww-ing” masterpiece I was going to be able to create - you know, the kind of masterpiece you want to show off and be proud of?  Well, my dream turned into a nightmare as I began taking my eyes off of what I was doing and looking over at a fellow classmate’s project.  Let me give you a little background on my fellow classmate…since day 1 of cake decorating class, and to be a little more specific “Wilton’s Decorating Basics” class (ahem, pay very close attention to the word “basics”), she has come in with pictures of some really amazing decorated cakes that she had done and did so well that I couldn’t understand why she was in “this” class - you know, the “basics” class.  The basics class is meant for lil’ ol’ people like me who know zilch about what they’re doing and need to be educated.  Anyways, very sweet lady and I have nothing personal against her (except the fact that her skills are better than mine – just kidding! Okay, no I’m not…just being real here, sorry :/ ) but I just can’t understand why she is in this class!  I wonder...does she travel around just for kicks and sign up for all of the Wilton’s Decorating Basics classes just to make other students feel crappy or what?  Is she like a secretive cake decorating villain with a passion to intimidate others to give up on their hopes and dreams of decorating cakes???!

So, getting back to my cake…everything started out great...really, it did!  My buddy, Lisa, made the fabulous red velvet cake and I made the cream cheese frosting.  The problem began though when the frosting didn’t crust fast enough to smooth it out and make the decorating more easy – the consistency should have been more thick – mistake #1.  Alas, as I waited for it to crust, my eyes started drifting over to Miss “Grade A” student aka “Cake Decorating Villain” and the praise she was receiving from the instructor – mistake #2.  Instead of keeping my eyes on what I was supposed to be doing I began to compare my project to hers thus getting intimidated and being concerned about her project.  Let me show you the results of that:  

                                                                

        Her masterpiece...                                                                                       

                     My disaster...

                            

I was soooooo disappointed and soooooo embarrassed I didn’t even want to be seen exiting Hobby Lobby with this in my hands!  What made it worse is when I dropped it off at my parent’s house (because I knew my brother would it eat)  and my mom thought my icing decoration on top was a fat man until I told her “No, mom, it’s a cupcake”.

So, I’m thinking things like: “ I’M A FAILURE!”  “Why can’t I have done a beautiful job like the other lady?” “How does she make it look so easy?”

Then, a man came to mind from the Bible by the name of Peter and a time when he was found comparing himself to someone else.  And what did Jesus say to him?... “What is that to you? You follow Me!”   So Jesus says to me “Don’t worry about the other person…don’t concern yourself with what they're doing – it’s none of your business! Don’t compare yourself or envy the outcome of someone else – you be focused on what I’ve called you to do.

It is so easy to get our focus on other people and what other people are doing and to start comparing our lives to theirs especially when it seems like their lives are more exciting, bigger, and better than ours.  Are you a stay at home mom comparing yourself to the successful, educated woman in the workforce? Are you one to compare your body to the model on the cover of a magazine? Are you a single person comparing yourself to your “happy” married friend’s life?  Are you a married person comparing yourself to your “happy” single friend’s life?  Are you comparing your house to someone else’s house?  Are you comparing your life trials with someone whose life seems uninterrupted by trials? - DON’T!  When we compare we begin thinking we’re failures; we get discouraged; envy and jealousy creep in; and, we try to be someone God didn’t create us to be.

God made only one me.  God made only one you.  He has a special, specific calling on each and every one of our lives.  Don’t waste time looking at and comparing yourself to every person around you…keep your eyes looking unto Jesus (Hebrews 12:2) and His perfect plan for you!

You can’t have your cake and eat it!   < --------See what I did there ;)

God Means it for Good

Then he dreamed still another dream and told it to his brothers, and said, "Look, I have dreamed another dream. And this time, the sun, the moon, and the eleven stars bowed down to me."… So it came to pass, when Joseph had come to his brothers, that they stripped Joseph of his tunic, the tunic of many colors that was on him. Then they took him and cast him into a pit. And the pit was empty; there was no water in it. And they sat down to eat a meal. Then they lifted their eyes and looked, and there was a company of Ishmaelites, coming from Gilead with their camels, bearing spices, balm, and myrrh, on their way to carry them down to Egypt. So Judah said to his brothers, "What profit is there if we kill our brother and conceal his blood? Come and let us sell him to the Ishmaelites, and let not our hand be upon him, for he is our brother and our flesh." And his brothers listened. Then Midianite traders passed by; so the brothers pulled Joseph up and lifted him out of the pit, and sold him to the Ishmaelites for twenty shekels of silver. (After some time has passed) ….Joseph said to them,"Do not be afraid, for am I in the place of God? But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive.

Gen 37:9, 23-28; 50:19-20

When things seem all wrong in our lives and literally nothing is going right, it’s funny how when we hear a verse like Rom 8:28 “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose” – it seems so cliché especially when it comes from a smiley faced person who seems to never have anything wrong going on in their world.  It’s like:  if I hear someone tell me that verse one more time I’m going to scream because I can’t possibly see what good is coming out of this one.  For example…try telling that to the mother and father who just lost a child.  Try telling that to the man who got falsely accused and thrown into jail.  Try telling that to a 12 year girl who is used as a sex slave multiple times in a day to put money in somebody else’s pocket.  Try telling that to the man who works hard to take care of his family and just lost his job.  Try telling that to those that are starving so much that the only thing covering their bones is their skin.  Try telling that to a family whose home just got swept up into a tornado.  Try telling that to the woman who is told she can’t have any children.  Try telling that to the child who is repeatedly beat up and locked into a closet. Try telling that to the wife going to bed alone because her husband has left her for another woman. Try telling it.  We may or may not have gone through these particular things but at some point we may encounter such a difficult time where we go around trying to make sense out of what’s going on in our lives and wonder what God could possibly be doing.  Does He really care about little ol’ me – one individual in the midst of 7 billion?  Can He really be working out these circumstances for my good?

The problem is we can only see what’s in front of us.  We are staring it in the face. We don’t understand it.  It doesn’t make any sense. We struggle in it.  Our hearts hurt.  We question why God would allow it.  But, then we remember - as a child of God, we have hope knowing that God sees the whole picture from beginning to end.  He understands it.  He can make sense out of it.  He says surrender the struggle to Him.  He pieces back the shattered pieces of our hearts.  He will bring the answer you need. 

When we start sorting through the fog and focus our attention on the Lord, remembering truly in our hearts that He is good and everything He does and allows is good (even though it may not seem that way at the moment) we find that place of rest.  Imagine Joseph, a young man with his whole life ahead of him.  The Lord was giving him dreams about how his life was going to be with his brothers bowing down to him. Then, not long after, Joseph found himself cast into a pit, sold as a slave by his brothers, accused of seducing Potiphar’s wife, thrown into prison, and forgotten about for two years …how could God possibly be fulfilling his dreams through this?  I’m sure at some point Joseph felt like his life was turned upside down as he couldn’t see just yet what God was doing.  The things happening to him were, yes, bad things but as we see some time later God turned all those things that were meant for evil to good.  God used everything that happened in Joseph’s life to bring about His perfect plan.

God works everything together for our good.  That doesn’t necessarily mean the things happening to us are “good”- sometimes they can be very tragic - but God can make beauty out of ashes (Isaiah 61:3).  He takes the things that the enemy can intend for evil in our lives and He can turn it around to be good.  Ashes have to be made before God can miraculously turn them into something beautiful.  He is taking the difficulties and working in us, refining us, and showing us amazing things we would have never seen unless we went through them thus building our faith even more. 

When we are being pushed over the edge of a skyscraper, God is our hero who sweeps in to catch us, saving the day at the exact and perfect timing.  He is the One who reveals the deep, secret things (Daniel 2:22) in due time.  Don’t lean on your own understanding because you can’t understand; choose to trust Him with all of your heart (Proverbs 3:5).  Just as Joseph had his day when He finally got to see God’s plan unfold and his past turmoil now made sense, so will we be able to one day look back and see that God had a plan all along.  You never know, maybe what you’ve been through or are presently going through will scream hope and salvation into someone else’s life.

I lay my "whys?" 

before Your cross

in worship kneeling,

my mind beyond all hope,

my heart beyond all feeling;

and worshipping,

realize that I 

in knowing You,

don't need a "why?" - Ruth Bell Graham

Fear Factor

He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust." Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler And from the perilous pestilence. He shall cover you with His feathers, And under His wings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your shield and buckler.  You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, Nor of the arrow that flies by day, Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness, Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.  A thousand may fall at your side, And ten thousand at your right hand; But it shall not come near you. Only with your eyes shall you look, And see the reward of the wicked. Because you have made the Lord, who is my refuge, Even the Most High, your dwelling place, No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways. In their hands they shall bear you up, Lest you dash your foot against a stone. You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra, The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot. "Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him on high, because he has known My name. He shall call upon Me, and
I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him.  With long life I will satisfy him, And show him My salvation." Psalm 91:1-16

It was an early (before the crack of dawn) morning last January when I rolled out of bed to get ready for the Missionary Day conference in Santa Ana.  I look forward to attending these every year to get the opportunity to hear what the Lord is doing in the lives of missionaries all over the world and also to always get a word of encouragement from the Lord through them.  I had to be ready to leave the house by 7:15 a.m. so of course to be ready by that time I needed to be up by 6 a.m.  At this time it was still dark but soon to dawn so I turned on the light in my bathroom area to shed light into my room as I made my bed.  I then proceeded to get into the shower and start my normal routine of soaping off and washing my hair.  In my shower routine I would occasionally look out the window above my shower to glance at the sky.  This one morning, as I glanced up, I noticed a round shadow that I couldn’t quite make out what it was as it was just beginning to dawn and with the light on it made it harder to see out. So, I look down thinking “No, it couldn’t be…” and then look back up again and see nothing.  So, I think “I must be seeing things. I’m still groggy, not quite awake yet, blah blah blah…” Then, after a minute or two, I begin scrubbing shampoo into my hair, look up, and realize I’m not just seeing things - there was in fact a man right outside the window looking in!  My reflex reaction:  screaming while hitting the window, pushing the shower door open, and then jumping out like I have never jumped out of the shower before – I was wide awake now!  I shut off the light, grabbed the house phone, scrambling to call 911, and while waiting for them to answer, dialed dad and mom’s house on my cell phone.  With shampoo still in my hair and now running down into my eyes and dripping all over the floor, I stayed away from the windows too afraid to look out in fear of what I might see. The water continued to run in the shower, fogging up the mirrors, as I waited paralyzed in fear on the phone waiting for the operator to tell me that help was at the door.   I felt defenseless and vulnerable; it seemed like eternity waiting for the police or my dad to show up.  Finally, I got a knock on the door and the operator confirmed the police were there and it was okay to open the door.  They looked around the property and in the field behind my house but found no one, just my patio chair sitting out of place directly beneath my shower window with shoeprints on the armrests.  There was nothing they could do but stick around the area for awhile. 

This left me feeling very fearful. The first night after that experience I had my brother sleep over with a baseball bat while I pretty much laid in bed all night listening to every sound around the house with a hammer next to me.  For weeks to come I was fearful to take a shower when it was dark, every shadow cast on my wall was assumed that someone was in the backyard, and I cried myself to sleep a lot of nights.  As time went on my battle with fear became less as I focused in on God’s Word and His promises to me.  Just as the psalmist wrote in the scripture above “His truth shall be your shield and buckler” so the truth of His word that He would never leave me nor forsake me(Hebrews 13:5), that He would command His loving kindness in the daytime and in the night His song shall be with me (Ps. 42:8), that He would be with me in trouble (Ps. 91:15), that He would give His angels charge over me (Ps. 91:11), and that He would make me dwell in safety so I could lie down in peace and sleep (Psalm 4:8) is what got me through.  These promises are what shielded and buckled my mind and heart.  Then, on December 15^th, I was faced with this same fear again as I came home to find my house broken into.  I just lost my grandma a few weeks earlier and was dealing with the loneliness of not having her with me so with all this combined together I am struggling with fear once again.  Is someone watching me? Will this person come back? What was that sound I heard? Did I just see a shadow...? You can drive yourself crazy thinking about such things.  I have to come back to over and over again that someone is watching me:  He is my Creator and Father; He loves me very much; He cares about me more than I could ever imagine; The things that happen to me – He allows; He is my strength when I am weak; He is the one who speaks peace to my heart and comforts me like no one can; He never sleeps; He is my shepherd;  He sees; He knows; He understands my fears; He is my God. 

Fear.  There is good, healthy fear and bad, unhealthy fear.  Good fear produces reverential awe and respect.  For instance, fearing God - not in the respect of being afraid of God, but fearing Him in such a way that you realize He is holy and you have reverence for Him.   On the other hand, bad fear produces stress, terror, anxiety, paranoia, worry, etc, that arises by evil, pain, impending danger, etc.  For instance, some people fear swimming in the ocean in fear that a shark will eat them.  Some people fear flying 30,000 feet above ground in a big, metal, man-made object with wings, in fear of engines failing thus falling through the air and crashing.  Some people fear the dark.  Some people fear roller coasters. Some people fear cancer and sickness.  Some people fear what other people might think of them. Some people fear the thought of losing a loved one.  Some people fear they won’t get that new job, new house, or new car.  Some people fear losing their job, their house, or their car.  Some people fear germs.  Some people fear stepping out in faith. Some people fear snakes.  Some people fear not fitting in.  Some people fear rejection.  Some people fear their own shadow. Some people fear everything.

A few weeks ago as I attended the Missionary Day once again in Santa Ana, I was reminded through one of the missionaries that fear is not of God.  In fact, fear is the opposite of faith. And we know that without faith it is impossible to please the Lord (Hebrews 11:6).  Do I really believe that God is going to take care of me and that He is more than capable to deliver me out of trouble?  Yes.  Am I cured of this fear that continually creeps in? No; I am still a work in progress.  So I will ask –

Lord, would You help me turn this fear around and would You use it to grow my faith? In those moments when fear begins to creep in, would You remind me that I am gathered together in Your arms – the most safest place to be? Would You take my every thought captive so that I may only reflect and meditate on Your love and that You only have plans of good and not evil for me?

What’s your fear?  It says in 2 Tim. 1:7 that “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”  I’ve learned that fear can take you over and cripple you if you let it go too far…don’t let that happen.  I challenge you to draw near to God and to His Word and He, in turn, will draw near to you (James 4:8).  When the voice of fear comes into your mind choose instead to listen to the voice of Jesus who says:

“Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you.  Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” (John 14:27) 

Eternity in Her Heart

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find 

out the work that God does from beginning to end…I know that whatever God does, It shall be forever. Nothing can be added to it, And nothing taken from it.
God does it, that men should fear before Him.

Eccl 3:11-14

This past Thanksgiving was very special and I will never forget it…it was at my house; dinner tasted great (thanks to my mom and Tiff); Joel, Tiff, and the girls were able to be with us this year; it was my first Thanksgiving having a boyfriend joining in; Dad, mom, and Nate were there; and the most special and memorable to me will be having my grandma with us one last time at the dinner table.  I tear up as I write this because it hurts so much but I want to take this opportunity to boast about my grandma before you all.  As a special touch to the Thanksgiving dinner table this year it was on my heart to have name cards at each plate setting at the table with scriptures on the inside.  So I picked out some scriptures, printed them out on the cards, folded them, mixed them up, picked up each one without looking at it and wrote a name on it.  I had prayed that the Lord would choose which scripture He would want for each person.  The above scripture is what my grandma’s name was placed on.   “He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts…” My grandma passed away three days later with eternity with Jesus on her heart…she was one of His and He made everything beautiful to her when He called her home Sunday morning at 3:34 a.m.  Just in the past couple of weeks, before she passed, on a couple of different times I heard her going around the house opening doors saying "I'm here! I'm here!" and then she would find me and ask if I was calling her and each time I told her that I didn't call her - she told me that clearly she heard someone calling for her - I believe it was the Lord calling her. It’s a mystery to me as death boggles my mind how at one moment a body can be moving and functioning, full of life, and within a split second the heart stops beating and life departs – it’s a mystery.  The day before she passed she said she wished the Lord would take her and then that evening before bed – the last time I talked to her -  she reminded me how the Lord took my grandpa just like that (while snapping her fingers) and she was telling me that’s how she wanted to go.  She had eternity in her heart…she groaned to be with Jesus and to be reunited with my grandpa again.

My grandma was a prayer warrior.  When she had a story to tell it would always be about when she was a part of an intercessory prayer group at her church years back.  She would tell about how she and the other women would get together and pray and how she would see God move and work through their prayers.  My grandma would always tell me she was praying for me and I would always know to go to her and tell her what I needed her to pray for me on – I could count on her for that. 

My grandma loved to sing.  In the middle of the night I would wake up to her singing an old hymn – never figured out which one it was – but it was a climbing the scale hymn where it would start low and then she would climb very high on the scale – it would always wake me up.  I thought it was sweet at first but when I started losing sleep I started throwing the pillows over my head. One morning I heard my grandpa talking to her asking her if she heard some moaning noise in the middle of the night – she responded with “I didn’t hear anything”.  I laughed to myself because I knew he was talking about her singing.

My grandma loved reading God’s Word.  She frequently would stop me to show me scriptures or ask questions about the Bible.  She would spend hours on end reading on the porch swing or on the couch.

My grandma was a giver.  She always put others before herself.  We would have to always force her to sit on the couch because she would always take the hard, uncomfortable chair first.  It would always turn into an argument - some of the times we would win and other times she would be stubborn and win.  She also loved blessing others with money…countless times it was to her joy to buy us dinner and on many occasions I would come into my room with money left on my dresser.  She didn’t know it but she always left it when I needed it the most…the Lord knew and she was just letting Him use her.  She knew the joy of the use of money – which was to give it away.

I loved my grandma very much and I would give anything just to have a little more time with her.  I miss her presence.  I miss coming home and seeing her sitting on the recliner.  I’m gonna miss walking into the family room after getting dressed up and having her tell me how beautiful I look before leaving the house.  I’m gonna miss how I would tell her something and she would reply with an answer that had nothing to do with what I said.  I’m gonna miss her smile.  I’m gonna miss watching Wheel of Fortune with her.  I’m gonna miss waking up to the theme song of “Walker, Texas Ranger” (Chuck Norris was her other man).  I’m gonna miss her hug and kiss goodnight.  I’m gonna miss the “I love you’s”.  I’m gonna miss going to her closet and laughing as I find my pink shirt hanging up in there. I’m gonna miss decorating our Christmas tree with her.  I’m gonna miss going to Lowes and picking out garden flowers with her in the spring.  I miss her, the house is cold and empty, and I am so lonely without her.

A few verses up from the scripture I quoted it says “To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven: A time to be born, And a time to die; …A time to weep, And a time to laugh; A time to mourn, And a time to dance;”  In this time of the physical death of my grandma, my family and I are in a time of weeping and mourning.  We lost a huge piece of our lives. While we do have the wonderful hope of seeing her again there’s still this time of weeping and mourning to take place.  We covet your continued prayers through this difficult time. I also want to take this time to encourage you who read this to slow down…take more time to connect with your loved ones and treasure the times you have with them – the good times and the irritating times.
 

Remember Me!

“Then God remembered Noah…”
Genesis 8:1

I read the above passage this morning and I so needed this reminder for today. For Noah and his family there was a storm raging all around them – literally the flood gates of heaven were opened, pouring water all over the earth and drowning everything they once knew, but God’s hand of protection was upon them the whole time.  In Genesis 7:1, we see that God invited Noah to come into the ark.  He was saying “Noah, I’m here in the ark, come in, I will be riding through this storm with you.  Here is where there’s shelter from the storm, a place of refuge, come in.”  Notice after God had told Noah to come in that there is nothing recorded that God spoke to him at all during those 40 days and 40 nights of the storm.  No doubt God had the ark in full control as it raged through the currents and got tossed to and fro by the waves.  No doubt they could sense His presence was with them, but do you ever wonder what was going on in their minds during those 40 days and 40 nights of silence from God?  No doubt that Noah and his family felt the bumping and rocking of the ark along the way.  No doubt they were wondering how long they would be in the ark.  

Have you ever been in the middle of a storm that has been raging for a very long time and been waiting and pleading with the Lord for a break in the clouds but there was nothing, just silence from Him?   And just when you see a crack of light peaking through the clouds, the clouds seem to cover it up again?  In these moments do you feel like God has forgotten about you, has abandoned you?  Take courage, beloved of God – He has not forgotten you!  When we come to Genesis 8 and read “Then God remembered Noah” it doesn’t mean that He forgot about him.  Believe me, God doesn’t have blonde moments – He wasn’t like “OMGEEEEEEEZ!!! I left Noah, his family, and all the animals on the ark – I hope they made it out alive!!!”  No! God is sovereign - in complete control at ALL times!  If we could only get this through our minds every moment of every day!   When it says “Then God remembered Noah” the word remember means “to pay attention to, to fulfill a promise and act on behalf of somebody”.  God was now going to act on behalf of Noah and bring the storm to an end.  It says in Psalm 139:17 that God’s thoughts are precious toward us and more in number than the sand of the sea.  His thoughts toward us are of peace and not evil, to give us a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11).  We are constantly on His mind. The cries of His children are never ignored.  Hold on - He is faithful! Know that He has placed you in His protective ark and you are absolutely in the safest place you can be - right in the middle of His will. 

God, remember me! 

Victoriously Stinky and Fragrant All at the Same Time!

 

“And I got it, thank God! In the Messiah, in Christ, God leads us from place to place in one perpetual victory parade. Through us, he brings knowledge of Christ. Everywhere we go, people breathe in the exquisite fragrance.  Because of Christ, we give off a sweet scent rising to God, which is recognized by those on the way of salvation — an aroma redolent with life. But those on the way to destruction treat us more like the stench from a rotting corpse. This is a terrific responsibility. Is anyone competent to take it on? No — but at least we don't take God's Word, water it down, and then take it to the streets to sell it cheap. We stand in Christ's presence when we speak; God looks us in the face. We get what we say straight from God and say it as honestly as we can.” 2 Cor 2:14-17 from THE MESSAGE

The on-going saga goes like this: Squirrel out-smarted the cage, squirrel out-smarted the rat traps, but the squirrel did not escape the gopher poison!  That’s right people poison was the last line of defense and it had to be done!  So, one might ask “How do you know the squirrel is dead?”  Well, four days after the feast of peanut butter mixed with “special” gopher food was placed out in the garage, with no apparent sightings or sounds of the squirrel, this smell started creeping over my closet/bathroom area.  As day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31….and now day 67 has passed the smell came in as weak, then strong, then stronger, then strongest, and is now creeping backward.  I guess you can say over the past 9 weeks I have experienced the stench of a rotting corpse.  If you have ever been in the same room as a cadaver (i.e. for an anatomy or medical class), walked by a dead animal, or perhaps had a rotting animal in your attic you know what I’m talking about as far as the stench.  Febreeze – tried it – didn’t work.  Air purifier – tried it – didn’t work.  Deodorizer – tried it – didn’t work.  Kirklands’ fragrance oil – smells so delicious, but no, didn’t work.  This leaves me------------>  : (  Turns out Mr. Squirrel breathed his last in a location impossible to reach and remove it.  How do I know that? I sent my little brother up in the attic to find the creeper.  But all I got out of that was him crashing through the ceiling in the closet of the guest bedroom making about a 4ftx4ft hole and no apprehension of the decomposing squirrel.  This leaves me---------------> :’(.  So, the conclusion:  I must continue to wait it out. 

So, as I look back on these past 9 weeks of the most horrible stench that I must wake up to, come home to, and go to sleep to, I ask the Lord WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???!!!  And then the above scripture came to mind and I say “Gee, thanks Lord for making this passage so real and applicable to me but you really didn’t have to!”  So, here it goes…

Do circumstances around you sometimes give you the feeling of being conquered, uncomfortable, that you’re coming to an end of a battle and it will end in defeat?  In doing some research to the above passage I came to find out that before Paul wrote this second letter to the Corinthians, that he was in a place of what seemingly appeared that his plans were falling apart.  He couldn’t find Titus, his letter deliverer.  He didn’t know what was going on in Corinth and how they received his first letter to them (this letter was a confrontational letter regarding their misconduct). He had open doors of ministry in Troas but didn’t have a peace to stay because he was distracted with concern for the Corinthians.  There were a lot of unanswered questions and he was in that place of not knowing what he should do next as he was seeing his plans weren’t going according to plan.  There was that common feeling that we have sometimes when we feel like we’re in limbo.  So what do you do when you’re in this place? Like Paul, you keep walking with God, keep being faithful with what God has entrusted you with, trusting Him, and simply waiting for His plan to unfold. 

When we come to this passage in 2 Corinthians 2, the fog of unknowns and feelings of defeat cleared as Paul now sees how God wanted it all along.  Paul relates it to the picture of the “Roman Triumph” the special tribute that was given by Rome to their conquering generals.  If the commander in chief won a victory over the enemy he was given a processional which included him riding in a golden chariot surrounded by his officers.  Also involved with this processional would be all the captive enemy soldiers and the Roman priests who would carry burning incense to pay tribute to the victorious army.  The procession would end with the captives entertaining the people by fighting wild beasts (The Bible Exposition Commentary/Wiersbe).   As Paul was giving this illustration he brings up how we as believers are the fragrance of Christ that diffuses to every person we come in contact with.  But, notice with me, how he makes the point that our fragrance affects different people in different ways.  When the people of Rome could smell the fragrance of the burning incense as it filled the city streets it meant to them the smell of victory, triumph, life, and rejoicing, but to the captive enemy it meant defeat and death.  As children of God we are a part of the victory that has already been won through Jesus Christ.  “We do not fight for victory, we fight from victory” (Wiersbe).  The victory has already been won by Jesus Christ so we can walk victoriously knowing that He is in full control, sovereign, He sees our circumstances, He sees the parade from the above view - beginning to end – and calls us to trust Him and walk in triumph with Him!  Paul ends this chapter with thankfulness to God for leading him (not according to Paul’s plans but God’s plans) and the realization that even when you feel (ßbe careful feelings are very deceptive!) defeated God is still working and is still opening new doors of opportunity to diffuse the gospel through the fragrance of your life…to those who are being saved and to those who are perishing.